Flashback Friday. 8-20.


Flashback Friday is the brainchild of Tia over at Christopher and Tia. Go on a flashback with me.

A very young *young is relative* mom with a very young son.  I bet we have 100 pictures of Little J before he’s two months old!  And that was before digital cameras.  I’ve been going through the pictures, sorting and throwing away the duds, getting ready to send another batch to ScanDigital for scanning.   Why did I keep dozens of bad pictures, thinking I had to keep every shot that was taken.  I kept this one because I was having a GOOD HAIR DAY!

That little baby just turned 13 and started 7th grade.

For you younger mothers, let me share something from my heart.  You are stronger than you ever imagine you could be.  You WILL get through these days of scattered toys, spilled milk, temper tantrums, too little money and too little sleep, too many diapers, putting in and taking out of the car seat.  Take every giggle, every wet smooch, every book time, every quiet moment of love, every this-little-piggy-went-to-market and tuck them away in your heart.  Pull those treasures out and run your fingers over them when you think you cannot go one minute longer.  The past 13 years have alternately sped by and drug on, but each day is 24 hours and you don’t get that time back.

Little J, I am proud and honored to be your mommy.

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P.S. If you are ready to start digitizing your photos, please give ScanDigital a try.  And even better…here’s a coupon code to get $20 off $100 of services.  Get ready.  Here’s the code. Rf448378

All writing and photos property of LoneStarLifer. 2010.

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Flashback Friday 7-9.


Flashback Friday is the brainchild of Tia over at Christopher and Tia.
Go on a flashback with me.

The telephone in this picture is blue metal.  My mom says that when I saw this in the store, I REFUSED to leave until she bought it.  And then I drug that phone around with me everywhere.  The first generation portable phone!  I still love to talk on the phone.  Big J cannot figure out what my girlfriends and I can talk on and on about.  I wonder if you are born with a phone gene?

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All photos and writing property of LoneStarLifer 2010.

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Flashback Friday – 18th Anny Thoughts


Flashback Friday is the brainchild of Tia over at Christopher and Tia.
Go on a flashback with me.

I found a gal @ Glamour Shots to do my hair & makeup. We got married in the home of friends.

Oh, my my.

Eighteen years ago this coming Sunday, this young woman was a radiant bride.  She posed for her wedding pictures with so many hopes, visions, dreams and plans.  She didn’t know Life was about to push shove kick her into a rough, tough future.

How could LoneStarLifer say "no" to this????

The fun began soon after the honeymoon.  We had a really happy week in Colonial Williamsburg, VA and came home to begin our new life together.  Big J was a book buyer for Book Stop, a book store company headquartered in Austin.  Barnes and Noble had recently purchased Book Stop and was closing the Austin office.  A week before the wedding, B&N flew Big J to NYC to talk about us moving there so he could continue his book buying with Barnes and Noble.  I quit my job in Houston, moved my belongings to Austin, had the wedding in Houston, honeymooned in VA, and returned to Austin to begin the move to NYC.

We came in from our honeymoon on Sunday night.  Big J went into the Book Stop office Monday morning.

And….. you know what’s coming.

They laid him off.  Yep. I had resigned from my Houston job so I wasn’t working, and now my new husband also had no job.  They did keep him around a few more weeks as they closed down the office.  I scrambled off to sign up with a temp agency until I found a permanent job with the UIL and we muddled through the first year of marriage as Big J looked for work.  I always felt that if we could make it through that first year, we could make it through anything.

I like this picture - we are walking to the car to drive to the reception. Our first time in the car as a married couple.

As I dressed and had my hair and makeup readied for the wedding, I didn’t have any concept of what “anything” might be……  I won’t go into the in’s and out’s of our everyday life.  We have had many many good times, and many many hard moments.  Times when I thought, “It can’t get any better than this,” and periods when I thought, “I cannot stay here one. more. second.”  Our years have been full of laughter, tears, love, layoffs, hurt, fun, communication, stress, sadness, family, miscarriage, financial woes, forgiveness, moving, close friends,  frustration, deaths, celebrations, surprises, special looks, anger, whispers, parties, strategies, pictures, softness, excitement, working as one, Little J, companionship, travel, hugs, xoxoxo’s, God.  He is the main component of that list, the glue, the connection, the staple, the paperclip that holds us together.  When I exchanged vows, I was making a covenant not only with Big J but also with God.  When I think I cannot go. one. more. minute. being married, I hold on to the covenant I made with God. I hold onto to Him until I can come back.  One of my favorite Bible verses is

Ecclesiates 4:12

Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

When Big J, God and I are braided together, I have one hand in Big J’s and one in God’s.  When Big J and I come unraveled and pull away from each other, I still am hanging on to God’s hand. God is faithful. I am never alone.  And time after time, for 18 years, we have worked it out.  And I’m proud of that.

When you look at your marriage and compare it to others, don’t.  Marriage is such a complicated, complex, evolving, growing, personal mystery entity and each couple has to figure out what works for themThey define their marriage, not yours.  The Bible has several scriptures concerning marriage, if you are looking for some words of wisdom.

And please, I ask the same.  Don’t rate/judge my marriage by yours.  No one has any idea what goes on behind closed doors, right? No one can have a real sense of how hard we’ve worked to not just white-knuckle our way through life together, but make it a place we both want to be. From the outside, you may look at a couple and ask, “why is she/he still with him/her,” or ”he/she could do so much better.”  Everyone’s idea of commitment is personal.  When you are looking at someone’s marriage, you are only seeing a small portion of the whole.

Please don’t read into these statements that I’m saying a marriage should continue if abuse or unsafe conditions exist. That’s a separate issue.  I’m talking about two people figuring out how to live together.  For some it’s relatively easy, for some, more effort is involved.

The wedding topper on our cake was the same one my parents used on their cake 40 years earlier.

There is so much more I could write about this lovely bride.  And maybe I will another time.  But for today, I am sending xoxox’s and thanks to Big J for 18 years of being my husband through thick and thin.  I was excited to start my life with you 18 years ago, and I am still excited (and realistic) to see what life unfolds before us.  I look forward to more years of exploring life with you, of finding more ways to love you, to honoring God with our marriage, and being open to what God is teaching me through our time together.

Catch the young men over to the right! They are now grown, handsome men,one married with a baby.

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All writing and photos are property of LoneStar Lifer. 2010.

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Flashback Friday


Flashback Friday is the brainchild of Tia over at Christopher and Tia. Go on a flashback with me.

Little J’s first Easter.

Little J was about 8 months when we celebrated his first Easter.  It was so fun to get his Easter basket ready and buy his little cute outfit.  We had just moved cities, probably had been in this house a month or less.  Little J was such a sweet baby and I loved loved loved his smile and laugh.  I was able to stay home with him for his first two years, and to this day, I think of those days as some of the best of my life.

Now Little J wants games for his DSi and gift cards from Borders.  It was so much easier back then……when I could control EVERYTHING!!!

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Flashback Friday.


My blogging bud Bobbi, who writes at kidtogrownup had something on her blog last Friday that interested me. She had a Flashback Friday post. Flashback Friday is the brainchild of Tia over at Christopher and Tia. Go on a flashback with me.

OK, go ahead and laugh.

Are you done?

This was the night of my 7th grade banquet and dance (1969).  I wasn’t allowed to dance, but it didn’t matter.  Nobody was going to ask THIS girl to dance!

I had most of my clothes made as I was tall and off-the-rack dresses were too short for me.  Well, not too short for me but too short for my parents.  That dress was blue dotted swiss.  The fab shoes will be revealed in a moment.

I went to Novene Cox’s beauty shop to have my hair sculptured.  She turned her garage into a shop and she did my mom’s hair every week.  I bought the gold clip at Snyder Drug.  The carnation corsage came from Sis’s Friendly Flower Shop.

That was a real organ in the front living room.  I took organ lessons and knew how to play.  Th front living room was only used for company…..and for my interpretive dances to Glen Campbell singing Wichita Lineman and Galveston.

OK. Ready for the shoes?

I should drag out the diary from this time period and use that for photo narration.  Meh.  That might put you over the edge.

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All writing and photos property of LoneStarLifer. 2010.

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